Fraser Trevor Fraser Trevor Author
Title: New life and new meaning can emerge from the wreck of dissociation without us constantly dissociating into the addiction of pointless escapism.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:
Awakening that comes from realising that suffering in our lives comes from the meaning we have given and it is unlimited. We are not sayi...

Awakening that comes from realising that suffering in our lives comes from the meaning we have given and it is unlimited.

We are not saying that painful things in our past didn't happen, but what we are saying is that they no longer have to be painful today.

And it's not as easy as changing your mind once or twice. It takes a work out, like in the gym. But if we try and try enough over time, new life and new meaning can emerge without us dissociating into pointless escapism.

One of the best ways we know how to do this is to take ourself out of our own story and step into the thoughts, feelings and beliefs of the action which hurt me. Not so we can make what has been done right, but so we can begin to understand the painful event from anothers point of view.

As we have guided members through this process, the outcomes have been amazing. They have found understanding on a whole new level of themselves and others. And, yes, even around VERY traumatic childhood events.

The point of awakening is not to make what happened right, but to bring a new sense of empathy and compassion to all involved – this includes us.

The best way to understand people who have hurt us is to awaken to them, because that is how we break the bond to the painful event. And from there, when we step into their shoes and consider how they must have been thinking and feeling, we begin to understand that their actions were not truly against us, but simply a request for Love or Significance in a very messed up way; that was the best way that they knew how to at that time.

And from a child within perspective, we can claim ownership over the meaning we give that event and no longer make it about how it hurt us, but about how they were hurt and see how our job is now to step into more empathy and compassion, both for them and for us. This takes us deeper and helps to bring clarity, resolution and understanding.

The words we are writing in DA. are easy to say and hard to do. It's not as easy as reading Dissociation Anonymous and being done with it. But our hope is that DA. can be a starting point for us on a journey out of the need for dissociation, to the freedom of empathy and compassion, so that one day soon we will be set free of the chains that bind us to the past.

When we see things from the point of view of others, we realise that what they are doing as not against us, but as an action to make up for the Love and respect in childhood that they didn't get. It's that simple. And in this realisation, we can transcend the hurt and the pain because we realise it was never about us in the first place, and so the victim story can be replaced with the story of the survivor who overcame the darkness in others with Loving-kindfulness.

Do you have what it takes to make a leap of faith?

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